Emotional

General

I am feeling emotional this morning. But not a bad emotional. Not a regretful, fatalistic, and depressed emotional. Instead, I find I am moved close to tears by various postings and pictures on facebook and other sites that reaffirm my beliefs and values – that show I am on the right path for me and my life.

I am experiencing gratitude at an emotional level. It feels good. I like that I can now experience this type of emotion. When I was using drugs and alcohol I could not experience an honest emotional feeling if my life depended on it – and it did. Because by not experiencing my God-given emotions I was dying by way of an emotional neuropathy.

This emotional gratitude is a reminder to me that, like all pleasant emotions and emotional states, it is not constant and ever-present, but earned through actions – the next right behaviors – the application of structure and discipline with a large dose of faith.

Today it is brought to my attention that gratitude is not just an intellectual understanding of the benefits of my life, but also an emotional understanding. It is one of those rare concepts that can be both irrational and logical.

And yes, this fails in every way to adequately describe what I am truly experiencing. Sigh. The trails and tribulations of being a writer.

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